About Last Night

“Heroes didn't leap tall buildings or stop bullets with an outstretched hand; they didn't wear boots and capes. They bled, and they bruised, and their superpowers were as simple as listening, or loving. Heroes were ordinary people who knew that even if their own lives were impossibly knotted, they could untangle someone else's. And maybe that one act could lead someone to rescue you right back.”

I’m writing this blog in response to some friends that expressed some hesitation about moving or visiting Brazil because I'm “struggling all the time”.

True story. The struggle is real.  The last month has been… difficult to say the least, but that’s life.

I live my life in the moment, bouncing from one crazy adventure to the next and seldom knowing what the next day, or the next week is going to bring. I just have this goal, this idea… this carrot on a stick in front of me that I keep chasing like a lunatic, and I wouldn’t change that for anything in the world.

Timing is everything.

I’m sitting on my roof drinking coffee now and a dealer just hopped over from the adjacent roof with walkie- talkie in hand, said hi and proceeded to jump to the next roof. I don’t know his name but he is related to Baby, one of the first people I ever met on my own in the favela. Baby has spent the last 8 months serving a 6 months sentence in jail.

My life is chaotic, but I’ve learned that it’s a lot easier to roll with the punches than it is to try to impose structure and organization on something that is inherently uncontrollable.

Timing is Everything

David and Goliath

Foto by Dan Behr

Two weeks ago I had no money, I was eating with my boxing coach and training in the favela because I didn’t have bus fare. But I am a strong believer in Karma and what goes around comes around, so when shit hits the fan I just sit back and wait for the blessing to rain down. 

Over the last two days, I’ve accumulated so much money that I’m paying other people.

The social project is doing better than ever, I'm moving in a couple of weeks, and my last weeks here I've been teaching a ton of English classes and enjoying my last weeks in Rio with the people I love. 

On the way home from Lapa

Timing is Everything.

6 A.M this morning and I was rocking combat boots, bright blue pants, and a hoody on the beach. It wasn't long before we were running into the (cold) ocean water after night in Lapa.

Bronx Jiu Jitsu

B*&#$ don’t kill my vibe

Photo by BJJ Hacks

It’s wintertime in Rio, and I’ve been preparing to move to Curitiba, the coldest city in Brazil. Everyone else, however, is flocking to Rio to kick it for the summer. Last Tuesday, I found myself posted up on a street corner at 1A.M in the morning waiting for my friend Fernando from Bronx Jiu Jitsu. I met him last year when he came to Rio to learn more about social projects and brush up on his jiu jitsu. This year,  two days after schools in New York let out, he came back with his family and friends in tow.

Connection Rio @ Cantagalo 

(They're not in Kansas anymore)

Connection Rio is my go-to place to reconnect with my Gringo-ness, the nature, or just to find a drilling partner to spend the afternoon with. Located in the quiet, multimillion-dollar neighborhood of Barra da Tijuca, it’s the perfect place to hang out on the weekends and get away from all of the craziness here in the Favela.

This week though, I decided to pull the gringos from their comfort zone and take them to train at Terere Kids Project/ Academia Fernando Terere (only after walking them through the feared favela’s and taking them to grub at Terere’s favorite restaurant).  I'm so used to the favela and all of its dirty, drug infested, rat ridden craziness that I don’t realize how shocking it is to go from the beaches and bars of Ipanema to hopping over shit in the narrow, cement lined alley ways lined with graffiti from inspiring artists and death threats from the local gang (Red Command). I think some of them were pretty shocked at what they saw! After training that night the Bronx BJJ crew headed back up to the favela for some BBQ and Caiprinha's. 

BootJuice BJJ

My friends from New York aren't the only people that came to spend summer in Rio. My homeboy Moz is also in Rio for the summer escaping the crappy English weather in Hudderfield-or-something, England. I met Moz last year at the Connection Rio house and have been training BJJ and watching shitty movies with him ever since. I help him with almost everything he needs to do that involves the Portuguese language (which is a lot of stuff considering he lived here for a year...) and he helps me suck less at jiu jitsu (and he's generally down for helping me with manual labor around the favela). 

Timing is Everything

David and Goliath 

Moz wanted to film a technique with one of the sponsored athletes (that destroys everyone) from the social project for his blog Tales from Deep Half, so I figured I would take advantage of the opportunity and see if I could get HT from BJJ Hacks to film it for him and take some professional pics that I could use for my Fightland Vice articles. HT helps me out a lot with the "social media" aspects of my social work I always appreciate when he comes to the project to do some filming (or when he answers the numerous questions that I ask him when I could probably just google it). HT and Moz are two more examples of the cool ass people and experiences that I have gotten to acquire that make living so far away from my friends and family worth it. 

So long story short. Yeah, the struggle is real, but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world, especially not a 9-5 job. 

How many people do you think slept in a room this size?

30

Kicking it with this dude that works as a doorman in the community before boxing at Nobre Arte.  He was talking about the 10 years he spent in jail. Sleeping on the floor in overcrowded rooms and no space to stretch your legs. Its humbling travel the world and get an opportunity to sit a hear people's stories. 

#LivingtheDream

#AboutLastNight

Caiprinhas in Lapa

Lapa!!!

Friday night in the Cantagalo Favela

Dude the Sell Caiprinha's friday

nights in the favela

South Bound & Down II: Burning Bridges

Artic Chaga Tea is a new supplement sponsors... well no TEA 

sponsor that will is sending me some hand picked Alaskan mushrooms!!

Their tea has amazing amounts of antioxidants and helps speed 

recovery time by a ZIILION!

I couldn’t think of any good ways to inform Rio de Janeiro that I would be leaving the comforts of my beachside favela. After several hours of debating it, I decided I was left with only one logical solution. Facebook.

Social media has reduced human interactions to comments and likes. A definite plus for shy people like me.

So, in one quick and concise status update, I informed the world… Well, the Portuguese speaking portion of it at least, that I would be leaving Nova Uniao and moving to Curitiba at the end of the July.

I initially expected people to talk a lot of shit (people probably are talking a lot of shit they just aren’t posting it on my wall), but I was surprised by the amount of support via comments and private messages that I received. They were an unexpected, but much needed reprieve from people that generally act as if I’m slightly crazy… living in the favelas of Brazil and all.



Sunday training in Curitiba. I was supposed to be back in Rio But I missed my flight and ended up spending some extra days!!


I’m not going to lie, I’m definitely apprehensive about leaving the picturesque beaches and tropical climate of Rio. Not to mention, the safety net of friends and pseudo family that I’ve assembled here. The thought of burning bridges, whether they are useful or not,  is always unsettling to a certain degree. As a buddhist I'm well aware that attachment causes suffering, but as someone thats been living with little more than 2 suitcases for the last two years, abandoning everything that I have come to know is perplexing. 

Plus, Curitiba is one of the coldest cities in Brazil.  I’m not sure what the hell I was thinking.

Which brings me to my next point…


What the hell was I thinking?




I mean seriously... leaving Nova Uniao, one of the best MMA teams worldwide. No longer will I be training next to Jose Aldo, Renan Barao, or the umpteenth number of UFC fighters the adorn the gyms prestigious pedigree. They have everything an athlete could desire... physical therapists, and nutritionists, a pool, sauna, and a strange room that they claim is for pilattes, although to me it looks like it came straight out of 50 Shades of Gray. I'd be traded up my sports bras for sweatpants!! And then there's the beaches of Rio de Janeiro. Front row for Carnival, New Years, and Christmas events. 

But, I came to Brazil because I wanted to fight. 

Although Rio is great, I’m not getting any fights here. It’s also a very expensive city. So after thinking about it, it just makes more sense to go to Curitiba where I can save money and fight more. So I'm trading up the beaches of Rio to train at Parana Vale Tudo (PRVT). Its relatively a small team compared to Nova Uniao, but they have a pretty big girls team with fighters from UFC and InvictaFC. 


Unlike Nova Uniao where there are about a million classes offered through out the day (wrestling, boxing, conditioning, Nogi, BJJ, Muay Thai), PRVT only has 1-2 training sessions a day. The week I spent in Curitiba meeting everyone was a complete 180 in my overly hectic training schedule. The team gathers in the afternoon and the coaches divide everyone based on what they need. The amateurs may practice a little muay thai off to the side while some of the girls roll Nogi to warm up a guy that has a fight coming up. Then switch to some work against the cage, muay thai sparring, and end with judo take downs. Its seems like a completely random, haphazard way to go about training, but in actuality it is tailored to the specific needs of each person. I was able to get more 1on 1 help from the coaches in their small informal setting than when I'm training with 30 plus people on the mats of Nova Uniao. 

Its definitely different. But it reminds me of my team MiKiDo from home. So in the end I think its a better fit for me!

On another note...I also got to travel to Sao Paulo with my friend who was giving a few seminars!

Shout out to Eduardo Castro owner of Half & Half academy for letting me Crash at his place!
Per usual, met some great people on the mats in Sampa. New friends and new places to visit on my next trip! 

They said I couldn't... 

So naturally I did!

Southbound and down: stressed and stranded

There is nothing like being in a 3rd world country with 25 dollars... No I'm sorry, worse, 25 Reais. Except maybe being trapped in your small favela "studio apartment" as rain pours down infiltrating the pourous cemenet that is your ceiling.

It was Sunday and I was furiously looking for my plane ticket confirmation in my email... Or at least the receipt to prove that I had dished out the money in the first place. Naturally I had waited til the lasy minute to realize I had NO CLUE where my ticket was for my 7 A.M. flight that was leaving the next morning.

I was pissed off and tired. I was beyond broke and extremely stressed. I had spent the better part of the weekend running around the favela selling a few odds and ends at the boxing gym and to the corner boys to accumulate some spending money. I had, in fact, been quite successful thanks to the fact that my boxing coach includes hustling and whoring in with my bag work and normal boxing training.

Note: by whoring I mean I have to look like a girl... Get my hair done, paint my nails, smell like Victorias Secret, and stop wearing clothes that make me look like a dude.

Well, he would also like if I would find a boyfriend and destress myself but... See last blog post for more on THAT issue!

So, I hustled up a little over R100 but had to immediately front it to pay competition fees for the the kids at Terere KidsCuritiba. The actual sponsorship wouldn't arrive until Monday, leaving me to fly to Curitiba with R25.

After an hour or so I was finally able to secure my electronic ticket and I surrendered myself to my sad excuse of a bed, curling up into a ball to avoid the water that was drip dropping down by my feet.

Cut to a week later
(Details of my black out week to come)

There I was crying in a corner in of the airport with $2.50 in my pocket and my last $150 in the bank. It was money for food and for the kids snack program... Money that would hold me over til i got paid next week.

It was however not nearly enough money to pay for the $200 rebooking fee and it was almost exactly what I would need to buy a 18 hour bus ticket back to Rio... Leaving me with no money for food.

Amazingly, my phone went off. My internet never works it takes all of 5 minutes out of wifi for me to reach my daily limit and my phone to be blocked. Whether im using it or not. Another perfect example of how Brazilian governement allows companies to rob and rape thw Brazilian people... And then you wonder why everyone is getting stabbed up! Im american and I can barely make ends meet. Poor brazilians are left with virtually no options so shanking and robbing comes naturally since the alternative is starvation...

Yeah, so, my phone went off and it was one of my former students from DC, currently unemployed and unloved by his less than affectionate mother. It was like the damned advising the damned and I had to admit that the irony of the situation turned my tears into laughter... And to any onlookers probably completed a portrait of a crazy gringa having a breakdown in the airport.

Then came that dreadful text...
"You have reached 80% of your daily internet and your about to be blocked"

So I grabbed my bags, said my goodbyes, and withdrew the last of my money
Before begrudgingly paying the R20 to return to the gym that I had been sleeping at for the week.

Everything happens for a reason!

That was the mantra that I kept repeating to myself as I fought back tears of frustration. There had to be a reason I was still hear, wasting money I didnt have. I told myself not to stress, after all Nicki Minaj says the faster you spend it the faster you get it back... And seriously, how can you doubt the infallible wisdom of one of hiphops biggest female MCs.

So what have I learned from this?
Nothing. Not a damn thing! Im sorry if you were looking for some bad ass wisdom on growth and personal enlightenment but nah... Im still waiting on that one.

What resulted from this?
Im moving out of Rio! The only (affordable) way for me to get back to Rio is to purchase a round trip ticket). I was planning on moving anyway, but I could have moved in with teammates in Rio and put it off for a couple of months, using my hatred for cold whether as an excuse to enjoy running around half naked on the picturesque beaches of Copacobana. (Curitiba is the coldest city in Brazil!).

What do I want now?
To move. Even though it will be hard to leave Rio, the favela, the beaches, and my kids (ill be working with them from afar).

To start fighting. Ive been at Nova Uniao for a year and half with no results.

To get my money up. Its time to get paid and get some major sponsors for the project. I dont want the work that Terere has started in the Cantagalo Favela to end when we are both gone! I want to go home this year, with some kids from the social project, to visit my family and compete.

In short:
Grinding is agonzing but gratifiying.
If you want to live the dream you have to expect a few nightmares now and then.

On Dating in Brazil: Sex On the Beach

“Hey Rasta Girl!”

 So I’m walking along Ipanema beach, trying to stretch my legs a little while I nurse a few injuries before heading to work at the Project when…

“Hey Rasta Girl!”

This was not said man’s first attempts to get my attention. A couple feet back I had heard the familiar cat calls but remained intent on listening to the DC trap music that was making me feel all warm and fuzzy inside with thoughts of home.

Homesickness has been gnawing away at my insides more than I would like to admit, and my hiatus from fighting is not helping. Taking walks along the beach that is 3 blocks away from the Favela where I live is a good reminder of how bad-ass my life is and how not homesick I should feel.

But…

My therapy was interrupted by this man, apparently so attracted by my dreadlocks, that he felt the need to come running off the beach after me.

And then he starts “the spiel”. 

Brazilians are known for their amazing asses, their exotic language, their beautiful beaches, and their godlike, steroid induced, out of this world abs… they are NOT, however, known for their originality, so I generally find myself rejecting the same lame sexual advances time and time again.

Within 5 minutes of meeting this strange man that was BBQing on the beach with a blonde girl and another person that I paid zero attention to, he offered me food, a joint, and… an orgy (with the blonde and/or two other girls). WTF, where do people get off nonchalantly offering sex to strangers as if it were exchanging business cards! How is that socially acceptable, better yet, how has that become the "norm". 

I used to joke around and say if people want to date me they best come correct and bring a resume. Well, Dude came correct and wasted no time in dropping his credentials. A black belt from Gracie Barra, Gordo Jiu Jitus… name drop here, name drop there, and so on. It’s a small world because I actually know Gordo as well. Then he began to elaborate on a menu of women, 3 to be specific, that he had to dish up if I was one of those people that "preferred that kind of thing".  I wasn’t impressed by his resume or anything else he had to offer, so I scurried away, popping my headphones back in my ear as I reflected on the situation that I had just escaped (oh we are now Facebook friends though).

Longboarding around Ipanema. 

For fun and because I have no car!

Dating in Brazil is somewhat of a nightmare. Conversations like the previous one are not an anomaly, as Brazilians tend to be very straightforward in their sexual intentions, wasting no time in trying to get what they want. They circumvent unnecessary dating rituals like dinner and movies and go straight for, “Oh, you live alone, can I come by”.

Women, in turn, have acquired their own defense mechanism, demanding money. If men have lost the art of romance and the ability to swoon, fine. That leaves women to just straight up ask for what they want. Money to maintain hair, nails, bikini waxes (this is Brazil after all), and whatever other random desire they may dream up.

Flying kites in Galo...

3 blocks from the beach

So, yeah, romance has been reduced to a financial transaction. Sex something that a mutually beneficial act between two parties. Love has become obsolete.

In most cases…

If it wasn’t for my homeboy Birrin that spent HOURS and HOURS on end video chatting his MRS and 1yr old daughter during our recent trip to Brasileiros in South Paulo, I might have lost faith in men in general. 

Around the Way...

Live from the Cantagalo Favela

A Seneagalese wrestler staying at Connection Rio

Stopped by the Cantagalo Favela to show us some of his moves

Random stuff often happens in the Favela

Padre Nuestro... Our Father... 

6 Pack Attack: The Nico Ball Diet

Everybody gets on me about the way I eat... or the way I always walk around with no shirt... So I thought I'd lay down a little insight on diet and try to be educational for once.

Weigh in pics at 118lbs (left), 108lbs (top), and 110 lbs

Diet makes all the difference. 

Remember when you were in middle school and you used to do those math equations that were like….

“If Sally has 2 green shirts, 1 blue shirt, and one pair of jeans, how many different outfits can sally make?”

Well that’s what the “Nico Ball Diet” is like… I mean, really its how every fighter and body builder here in Brazil eats. “Chicken and sweet potatoes” is the key to achieving what Brazilians call “being dry” or cut or ripped or just down right sexy!

Drying out, it should be noted, is different than bulking up.  The goal is to develop more muscular definition and functionality as opposed to full on mass.

The magical diet combination includes: Chicken breasts, sweet potato, whole grain rice, and whole grain pasta.  You can throw in fish too, but my lack of cooking skills leaves me eating canned tuna, which is filled with sodium and other preservatives.

On top of the basic combination, I eat a ton of fruits and vegetables. Every Tuesday, I go to a farmers market and stock up on a ton of colorful things, some of which I have no idea what they actually are… like Cacui.

But whatever, its healthy.

So basically, all I ever eat is…. Chicken with sweet potatos, egg whites with sweet potatos, chicken with whole grain rice, and tuna with whole grain pasta. Then add in some colors (fruits and veggies) to make it pretty and get the right vitamins and viola… abs

Oh yeah, I forget to mention…. The don’ts

I don’t eat fat or sugar and I cut out any unnecessary sodium and carbs. 

Anyone that truly knows me, knows that I consume and unhealthy amount of coffee with a ridiculous amount of sugar on a daily basis!

Well not anymore! I use honey to substitute sugar and I don’t drink juice or soda. Yeah juice is just as bad as soda must of the time, worse if you consider that fact that it tries to disguise itself as healthy. This also means no acai! Whomp whomp! No that’s a lie no one goes with no Acai but I only have 1 a week, if not every two weeks. So basically all I drink is water and supplements, AAAAND, I make a lot of natural juices with fresh fruit (and spinach) when my body can’t bare any more water intake!

Fruits, veggies, and a ton of vitamins!

Nothing frozen, nothing processed! 

One of my friends even has me drinking (and even worse, enjoying) beat and carrot juice. I throw in some cucumber to sweeten it up which is ok. What isn’t ok is putting in orange. It’s a really common to find the combination of beats, carrots, and oranges, but apparently, the acidity from the oranges messes with the nutrient absorption of the beats and carrots, so you end up gaging down beats for no reason!

Beats, Spinach, and Carrts baby!

No fats! 

That means I don’t eat butter! I’m sure there are many other things that fall under this category but butter is the big one. I cook with olive oil (because I can’t afford coconut oil). The only kind of cheese I eat is “quejo minas”. I’m not a foodie, so, I can’t explain why this cheese is the only kind of cheese I can eat, but whatever, I do as I’m told. I have heard from a friend that quejo minas forms a big part of the Gracie diet as it balances out the acidic levels from the massive amounts of fruits the Gracies try to shove down your throat! From a more practical perspective… cheese is yummy especially when you can’t put butter, salt, or ketchup on stuff to get some of that good old American super-processed taste that I know and love!

No turn up!

This means that I can never, ever drink! Ever! Between the desire for amazing abs and the fact that I compete Jiu Jitsu every month, I pretty much annihilated my alcohol tolerance. Alcohol in itself is bad for the body as it causes dehydration and lowers blood sugar, which in turn, lowers athletic performance.

But all science aside,  take into consideration my sport of choice: MMA. Ever get punched in the liver when it’s filled with Henny? It hurts… a lot. Your capacity to deal with a hard body shot is increased incredibly when your liver isn’t busy trying to save you from alcohol poisoning!

Get Hip

Gym Jones and its founder Mark Twight are famous for sculpting the sexy beasts from the movie 300. His philosophies on working out and fitness are definitely worth checking out if you are a serious athlete!

The physical work is not enough, if your only paying attention to your training and your recovery YOUR NOT DOING ENOUGH!!! No amount of hard work can balance out diet deficiencies! 

I come here every Tuesday to buy my 

fruit. We talk about fighting and he 

feeds me!